We have been blogging about things that can contribute to social isolation in teenagers. Today I want to address low self-worth. Teenagers may often have issues with poor self-worth. I think about self-worth in two ways. There is the aspect of feeling like you don't have anything you are good at. There is also the aspect of feeling like at your core you don't measure up. Since adolescence is such a time of flux it is common for teenagers to feel like they are not valuable. Their bodies are changing and things they used to count on no longer work the same. For example, if there is a large growth spurt they might be seen as clumsy since where they put their feet when walking doesn't work the same; not until they adjust to the changes. The ways they always interacted with friend family etc. now doesn't seem to work the same and at times they open their mouth to say something and someone else speaks in a different voice or especially with a different tone. All of these changes can contribute to poor self-worth.
There are other situations when a child has been abused either physically or sexually or other traumatic factors and they can feel defective at the core. I recently saw the movie "Extremely Loud and Incredibilly Close". (If you haven't seen this movie you should see it even though it is very sad.) In this movie Oskar is very traumatized by his father's death in 9-11. He struggles with his own worth as a result of this loss. In situations of abuse, at times, a survivor is known to say "I must have been defective when I was born or God would have given me to different parents. These traumatic events lead very directly to poor self-worth.
In any situation of poor self-worth teenagers may isolate more because they do not feel like they measure up or it is too difficult to try to join in when they feel less than….. In these situations it is important to do thing to improve your child's self-worth. I think tomorrow we will address activities to do about self-worth. Sherri
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