Dr. Debra and I have frequently talked about things parents need to do differently. I think parenting is a tough job. When you child was an infant your worried that s/he was fragile. Eventually you learned that they were not all that fragile. But then came the teenage years. There was nothing to prepare you for how difficult adolescence would be. During this stage of life we worry about everything. The stakes seem so high. There are cars, sex, drugs and alcohol among other things. Then there is college, career paths, and dating. This is probably the most difficult and stressful phase of parenting.
Think about huge tasks you take on; a big project at work, running a marathon; whatever for you is a big thing that you must train and prepare for. I think raising teenagers is the same. One thing we forget is that you have to take good care of yourself. This means eating well, getting exercise and enough sleep. It means finding healthy outlets for stress. Drinking, overworking, overeating, etc. are not good ways to cope. If you have a parenting partner this is someone you can talk to either if your teen stresses you out or life events are stressful. Whatever the stressor find ways to disperse the stress. When you have things to take care of with your teen it is best if you can remain calm. Taking good care of yourself and dealing appropriately with stress will help you be better parents and make you feel better. This is not selfish it is just gook preparation. And remember, I frequently tell parents that parenting is the most important job we do but we forget to have fun with it. Sherri
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